DARE TO ASK: Do jaws drop over piercing of a tongue?

By PHILLIP MILANO, The Times-Union

Question

I have a tongue piercing. In all other respects I look conventional. What would your reaction be if you saw me?

Anne, 19, London

Replies

The only thing that runs through my head is "ow!" I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area, and it got to the point that if you didn't have multiple piercings and tattoos, people would look at you oddly.

Doug, 39, Phoenix

I would think there is some lucky dentist out there who is going to be driving a fancy sports car some day off your teeth. Hope you are keeping an eye on denture ads, because you will be wearing them.

Steve, 46, Houston

I would suspect you're kinkier than average.

Lee, 26, male, United Kingdom

I wish I could say it doesn't bother me at all, but it does. If I were a hiring manager with two identical candidates, one pierced and the other not, which one do you think I would hire?

Dave, 48, Bristol, Conn.

I never judge people with piercings as troublesome or lawbreakers. It has nothing to do with character. Employers in general refuse to hire anyone with body piercings, which shouldn't be an issue if it's in moderation.

Monique, Fort Myers

Fifteen years ago I would have thought: "Cool. She must be a bad --." Now I think, "Fashion takes every authentic statement and renders it pointless."

J., 34, female, Chicago

When I see women with pierced tongues, I assume they are promiscuous. When I see men with pierced tongues, I assume they are promiscuous and homosexual.

Nik, 24, female, San Francisco

Expert says

Is a tongue-lashing in order here? Not really, says Victoria Pitts, sociology professor at the City University of New York and author of In the Flesh: The Cultural Politics of Body Modification (Palgrave Macmillan).

While youths often get tongue piercings to feel unique, in reality they are just following cultural trends - even as they hope to send a message that they reject mainstream culture.

"They are trying to express their individuality, but the irony is that . . . when we mark our bodies, we are doing something about connectedness, because we are acknowledging how our bodies are social spaces that are read by others," said Pitts.

No, it doesn't help at job interview time, but most youths don't hang onto fads long and move on to something else, anyway, she noted.

That's one reason tongue piercings don't pose much of a health risk: They're removable and generally not worn for long periods.

As far as people with tongue piercings being more interested in sex or sexual foreplay, Pitts said that's nonsense.

"Men in particular like to sexualize certain areas of the body, including the tongue. But there's no legitimacy to that argument."

Phillip Milano, author of I Can't Believe You Asked That! (Perigee), moderates cross-cultural dialogue at Y? The National Forum on People's Differences. Visit www.yforum.com to submit questions and answers, or mail to Phillip Milano, c/o The Florida Times-Union, P.O. Box 1949, Jacksonville, FL 32231. Include contact information.